Trigger warning: Loss of a parent & grief.

2020 was a year unlike any other - for both my family and the rest of the world. To give some context, my mom was diagnosed with stage three ovarian cancer in 2014. She had discomfort in her stomach that had been misdiagnosed as constipation that had been bothering her for months. She went to the emergency room on Christmas Day because she knew it would be quiet. She was funny like that. I was in the middle of my degree, completing a co-op term in Kelowna. I tried to quit school and move home. Mom didn’t let me.

After a year of chemo, she was in remission. I finished my degree in Hospitality and Food Administration at the University of Guelph and moved to Vancouver. I worked as a hotel Banquets Captain where I’d supervise events like weddings and conferences. It was an industry I loved - bringing people's visions to life and helping them celebrate big lifetime milestones and achievements. I moved back to Victoria from Vancouver in 2017 when my mom relapsed for the second time and continued working in hotel banquets. Luckily, mom spent over a year in remission before she relapsed again in the summer of 2019. But this time was different, the cancer had advanced to stage four and we realized that she was no longer responding to chemotherapy or radiation. By November 2019, she transferred into palliative care and we were told that we had weeks left together, not even months.

I quit my job a day later. Two days after she was transferred to hospice, I bought and Ipad and began drawing like crazy. I had wanted to explore digital art for a few months but was waiting for a sale. I started an Instagram account to share my artwork. I didn’t talk about mom and her condition until after she had passed away. I drew manically while she slept - of places we’d been together and revisiting our favourite memories. I wanted so badly to show her what I was capable of, how grateful I was for the life she gave us, and how much I loved her and the sacrifices she made for us. She passed away on December 2, 2019 at The Victoria Hospice Society.

My mother was a crazy strong minded superwoman. Looking back now, I can see that she worked hard to make sure that we would be okay after she passed. When we sold our family restaurant in 2007, she changed professions and became a unit clerk in the hospital. For the next 13 years, she worked in all over the hospital in hospice, oncology, the cardiovascular unit and the pain clinic. It was easy to see that she was beloved throughout her treatment because it felt like we had friendly helping hands all along the way. In the month before she passed, Mom prepared us for life without her as best as she could. She connected us with counsellors, told us it was okay to cry, reminded us to depend on one another and made sure we knew that without a doubt she loved us.

1 (2).jpg — December 2, 2019

The day Mom died. We cried all day, but knew that Mom would want us to make sure we ate well. In her honour, we bought a Pizza Hut cheese stuffed crust pizza.
When I see this picture, I see a lot of pain. But I also see a lot of love, perseverance and a determination to live life the way Mom wants us to.

The Worlds Best Friends

A week after mom passed away, Bonnie flew out from Ontario. We took a little trip down to Forks, Washington because we love Twilight. It was a special trip because every time we would pull over the sky would suddenly clear up and the rain would stop.
Selena came with my family to Tofino. We stayed in Ucluelet and we saw sealions for the first time!
Selena, Sydney and I all went to Salt Spring Island. We stayed at Cusheon Lake Resort and enjoyed sampling ciders, cooking our own elaborate meals (well, Selena did all the cooking) and spending our nights chatting in the hot tub.

Starting a Garden

By the time Covid-19 hit Canada, my family had already been in isolation for a few months as we didn’t have the energy to interact with people yet. We had been following the situation closely since we have family in Hong Kong.
It was around this time that Dad and I began our garden - starting seedlings in our living room and eventually cultivating a great vegetable garden in our backyard! We grew loads of lettuce, kale, tomatoes, peas, pea shoots, potatoes and cabbage!

First Art Show (in 9 Years)

I had my first art show in May at Township Coffee at the beginning of the pandemic. Erik, the owner, has been our family friend for a long time and encouraged me to not only get my art up on his walls but to also sell my work. The “Gordon Head Series” drew a lot of local attention and I was absolutely blown away by the kindness and support the community gave me. This was the beginning of the art business!

A Lovely Quiet Summer

We spent our summer enjoying the sun, hiking, visiting the beach and even visited the new Sunflower farm in Saanichton.

Mom always loved hiking and taking photos of nature. We continue to honour her legacy by using her camera!

City of Victoria Public Art Contest

I entered a contest with the goal of having my art displayed in some of the map kiosks downtown.
A driver crashed into the kiosk that my work would have been in so my poster was hung in the window of the archive office. I was so happy to see it there - it is only three storefronts down from where my parents restaurant used to be!

Taking the Leap

By the time September rolled around, I had been rejected for more jobs than I could count. Apparently event experience is not very helpful in a pandemic! Luckily, this gave me the push I needed to pursue art more seriously. I invested in this printer, started working more seriously on my website and began thinking of myself as a “full time artist” instead of "“someone who is unemployed that happens to do art”.

YYJ Craft Crawl

Because of Covid, holiday fairs were not able to run as normal. In response to this was the creation of the YYJ Craft Crawl. I was able to sell artwork from my driveway, though it was very cold!

Bolen Books Bookmark Design Contest

I was so happy that my design was chosen to be printed at Bolen Books! When I was younger, mom would often take my brother and I here after dinner to browse books. Mom rarely had the budget for toys but somehow she always had enough for a new book!
These bookmarks are free with any purchase.

November 11th, 2020

We celebrated Mom’s birthday by sharing her favourite indulgence: A bucket of KFC chicken.

shop live.png — December. 4, 2020

I soft launched my website store to friends on Dec.1, the night before the first anniversary of my mom’s passing. I knew that she wouldn’t want something silly like an anniversary to stop me!

I fully launched and opened the store on Friday, December. 4, 2020.

Christmas, 2020

Christmas this year looks very different from last year. Dad and I are spending our evenings driving around taking in all of the wonderful light displays. December is hard for us, and probably always will be a little bittersweet.

Thank you for reading all the way to the bottom! I hope you learned a little bit more about my journey and how this all started. I am grateful that I’ve spent this year safely with my family, for the support that my friends and family have given me, and for all the love and support I’ve received for my artwork! I have a lot of ideas for 2021, and am excited to start some new projects!

2020: How Art by Sharon Lam Began